My Dearest
>Dearest Hurricane,
I am sorry to inform you that your twin, the one I purchased at the thrift store when I purchased you, has undergone some cosmetic changes.
You see, while giving her a bath in the kitchen sink I heard a loud pop and noticed a large crack in her base (likely a result of the combination of scalding hot water inside her while she sat on a cold sink bottom).
A few weeks later the crack turned into a severed break! I could not bear to throw her out but instead I placed your twin upside down to mourn her unfortunate state.
Then one day my hubby, desiring to relieve the two of us from our misery, had a wondrous plan! 
He would gently break off the rest of her base and sand down the sharp edges. The plan was successful with one exception, she was still a bit rough around the edges.
Thank goodness a little dressing of burlap and rope could come to her aide and cover her flaws.
She is living a new life. She has blossomed into a beautiful cloche!
